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The Glow Up Season Podcast

Episode 16 | Social Media & Self-Esteem: How to Beat the Social Media Comparison Trap

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asia.hilario

It’s giving Ariana.

It’s giving Ariana.

My biggest flex is that I don’t have to.

My biggest flex is that I don’t have to.

If you pretend that you’re not hurting, you cann

If you pretend that you’re not hurting, you cannot heal. The ‘out of sight, out of mind’ philosophy might lighten the load in the moment, but it will come creeping back— and stronger. ⁣
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The only way to heal is to go about it head on. ⁣
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It is okay to feel hurt. You are human, that is normal. ⁣
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The first step in healing is acceptance. Now accepting does NOT mean you excuse or condone what or who hurt you. ⁣
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Acceptance is a simple recognition of the truth that is the way things are… in this moment.⁣
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Acceptance is the key that opens the door to your healing journey. Meanwhile, denial is the biggest barrier. ⁣
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Acceptance doesn’t have to happen quick and most times it won’t be, some things are just too big to snap back from. That’s normal. Honoring your timeline is part of the healing, too.⁣
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When we acknowledge the presence of painful emotions and cultivate self-compassion for any suffering they’re causing us, it takes the sting out of them. Then we can patiently wait until they yield to the universal law of impermanence.⁣
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“Awareness of impermanence will give us a sense of urgency that we must use every precious moment.” -Dalai Lama⁣
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There’s a reason they say the present is a gift 🎁 ⁣
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The longer we deny the pain, the more it robs of us of this gift.⁣
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And then there may be a thought of, “well.. I’ve been fine denying things thus far, why should I stop now?” ⁣
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And my answer to that is this: Sometimes we don’t feel the weight of something we’ve been carrying until we feel the weight of its release.⁣
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Accept- without judgement, feel, and then we can release.⁣
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Swipe to see a helpful graphic ☔️

“Boy body”— a term that was thrown at me in

“Boy body”— a term that was thrown at me in high school and beyond. Thrown at me by other women and also by men- specifically when I’ve turned them down or by ex boyfriends who spoke bad about me when the relationships ended.⁣
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It was something I brushed off on the surface, but internally struck a cord with me especially since I come from a family of 6, with 3 brothers and was a tomboy growing up so on multiple occasions I would overhear my mom correct others when they would say “wow! Four boys, you have your hands handful!”⁣
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As children we aren’t equipped to process these hurtful moments properly. Additionally, we need adults to help us regulate our tough emotions, validate them & provide a safe space to express them. Unfortunately my parents didn’t have the capacity to do that so what the mind does is it stores those hurtful moments into our subconscious and tucks them away. ⁣
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And then into our adulthood, those unprocessed memories resurface in the form of automatic responses, protective reactions, habits, limiting beliefs, etc. ⁣
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Repeatedly being called a boy caused me to, despite contrary belief, feel extremely uncomfortable during photoshoots in adulthood. I had an underlying, nagging thought that maybe I didn’t look girly enough or that people would notice my “boy body” in the photos I took, so I never actually went outta my way to book & pay a photographer for photos. Before this point all the ones in the past were favors for photography friends. ⁣
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After starting my self love journey years ago that nagging thought eventually became quieter and quieter, allowing me to embrace my body & what it does for me.⁣
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But I knew that I had a little more work to do because when I was approached for this shoot, I kept pushing off the date (no really, we were supposed to shoot last year LMAO). ⁣
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So after peeling back more layers and uprooting deep conditioning I was able to push past my comfort zone & finally do the shoot.⁣
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The most common misconception when I introduce myself as a “Self-Love coach” is that I have it all together. I do fuckin NOT lmao. Far from it. ⁣(continued in the comments)

Tonight is a super special night for me. I get to

Tonight is a super special night for me. I get to speak at “I Made the Leap, So Can You!” for American Business Women Day for the CNMI Small Business Development Center- who’s mission is to support the growth and the economic development in the CNMI (the islands I come from). More specifically to aspiring women entrepreneurs.⁣
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To be a businesswoman is one thing, but to come from a poor upbringing, living in a house with a tin roof and no hot water and then coming to America, launching my dream business and thriving, and then sharing my resources, guidance, and knowledge to women of the CNMI is an absolute honor. ⁣
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When I moved to America I vowed to always give back to my community back home. Everything I do is for the CNMI. ⁣
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Pinch me moment. Thank you America’s SBDC: CNMI for this opportunity. ⁣
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Not me being a whole ass business woman 😭😭😭⁣
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Swipe to see a photo of the house I grew up in 🥺

It’s the:⁣⁣ - Regulated nervous system throu

It’s the:⁣⁣
- Regulated nervous system through your provided safety & integrity ⁣⁣
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- Unprompted, planned date nights (and extra bonus cuz you send me Google invites damn it)⁣⁣
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- Breaking generational curses TOGETHER ⁣
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- Humility, accountability, & forgiveness in times of conflict⁣⁣
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- Being a giver (even more than I am which is hard to beat)⁣⁣
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- Impeccable conflict management and enthusiasm to find new tools ⁣
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- Asking me “do you want a solution or just a listener?” before I vent⁣⁣
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- Fresh flowers in my office every day ⁣
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- ALL the love languages expressed⁣⁣
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- Making me feel seen, heard, and understood⁣⁣
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- Unwavering support of my dreams- even being a participant my beta testing
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- Reciprocated energy and effort⁣⁣
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- Wise counsel and constructive criticism that supports my growth ⁣⁣
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- Holding non-judgmental space ⁣⁣
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- Courage to feel through your emotions and pain instead of masking it, therefore healing parts of yourself so that we can coexist in peace ⁣⁣
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FOR ME! ⁣⁣
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After spending almost the entirety of my life in a state of fear, it feels nice to finally feel safe.⁣⁣
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Happy anniversary love bug 🐞💕

Renaissance woman.

Renaissance woman.

Ahem. Gentle reminder! Studies have shown that su

Ahem. Gentle reminder! Studies have shown that suppressing emotions actually endangers your health and well-being, both physically and psychologically.

Emotional suppression (having a stiff upper lip or “sucking it up”) might decrease outward expressions of emotion but not the inner emotional experience. They actually make the emotions even more intense.

Daring to set boundaries is about having the courage to love ourselves even when we risk disappointing others.

Speak up. Take up space sis! 🗣

Side note: Taking up space means finding the strength to believe that your voice is valid. Okkurt. Let’s get it queen.

Photo dump of Family time in Joshua Tree 🌵

Photo dump of Family time in Joshua Tree 🌵

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